SOAL 15
SOAL 58: Everybody Has A Story

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Since she was a little girl, Ally’s mission has always been to learn people’s stories. Making connections with others has always come naturally for her. Ally is an anchor and reporter and has done in-game hosting for the Colorado Rockies, Colorado Rapids, and Colorado Mammoth as well as the ESPN X-games. She now spends her days as a freelance reporter covering College Football for Big 10 Network. Ally discusses with us the importance of leading by example and how to respond in intense situations. There’s a bigger, better story out there for all of us.

Everybody on this earth has a story. And we’re here to grow, be resilient and move forward, and make connections.

There’s a bigger, better story out there for all of us.

It takes strength not to put energy where the negativity is.

True happiness is living in the moment.

You’ll Learn

  • Values are a guiding principle for anyone that’s in leadership.
  • Lead by example.
  • Drama: “Drastic Reactions About Minor Attributes.”
  • Strive to be what you want to be and embrace the highs and lows.

Resources

Transcript

Eileen:

Hello and welcome to the Soul of a Leader podcast, where we knight soulful conversations with leaders. In today’s episode, Dr. Alicia and Dr. Eileen talk with Ally Wyatt about, Everybody Has a Story.

 

Alicia:

Hello, and welcome to the Soul of a Leader podcast. In today’s episode, we have Ally Wyatt. Since she was a little girl, her mission has been to learn people’s stories. She needs to know what makes them tick. With a camera by her side, she never missed an opportunity to capture life as it unfolded, given the little brother play-by-play along the way. After end game hosting for the Colorado Rockies, Colorado Rapids, and Colorado Mammoth, as well as the ESPN X Games, Ally joined Fox Sports San Diego, as the host of the Padres POV filming as the sideline reporter for the MLB team from 2015 through 2016. Ally reported for the Denver Nuggets and Colorado Rapids full-time on Altitude Sport. She also hosted the in-studio Air Force Falcons report and co-hosted episodes of the successful NBA podcast Road Tripping with Richard Jefferson during the 2017 through 2018 season. Welcome to Soul of a Leader podcast, Ally.

 

Ally Wyatt:

Thank you so much for having me guys.

 

Eileen:

Welcome. We’re so glad to have you. Ally, that was such an impressive background and bio and I can’t wait to continue on this conversation.

 

Alicia:

Yes.

 

Eileen:

Is there anything that Dr. Alicia missed when sharing your bio?

 

Ally Wyatt:

Since my time in Denver, I’ve moved to Chicago and I’ve done a lot of freelance work for Big Ten Network. I actually did a countdown for new year’s through NBC Chicago, which was really fun. That was much more social and that sort of thing. But besides that, that’s pretty much the gist of it. And then right now, since the pandemic I’ve been really just isolating like I know most of us to have because I am expecting a baby girl here and [crosstalk 00:02:38]

 

Alicia:

Congratulations.

 

Ally Wyatt:

Yeah, thank you.

 

Eileen:

Congratulations, that’s so exciting.

 

Ally Wyatt:

Thank you.

 

Eileen:

And I wanted to hit on your bio. It’s said that since you were a little girl, you have loved stories. And I share that stories are the window between your heart and your head and it connects those two. What ignited that if you can recall, or as you’ve grown older to share that love of telling stories?

 

Ally Wyatt:

It’s a really good question. I think since I was a little girl, I’ve had… I have two wonderful parents who were able to spend a lot of time with my brother and me, and they had this rule since we were little that every single night, and I’m talking like very, very little, we would have to sit at the dinner table and without obviously any technology and we would have to sit there for an hour to two hours and just chat. And I think for better, for worse that developed the love of talking for me.

 

Ally Wyatt:

You know you get to a point where every single day you can say like, “Oh, what did you do today?” But you have to make it a little bit more exciting. So, the storytelling just really began. And we also… My parents hosted exchange students when I was 6 years old. So, went from having one amazing beautiful girl from Brazil that was supposed to stay with us for two months to… All said and done, we had 18 different people from around the world. The longest-lived with us for 9 years and the shortest was 18 months.

 

Eileen:

Wow.

 

Ally Wyatt:

So, a lot of different people. So, then of course, too, with having all those cultures and those beautiful people around our dinner table every night and the rule still applied it didn’t matter who you were, you had to sit there for two hours. We had a lot of storytelling, that happened. So, I think that’s probably where it initially began.

 

Eileen:

What a cherished moment that you can remember and in a time of electronics, that is phenomenal. I would like to see my nieces and nephews do that. I don’t think it’ll work.

 

Alicia:

Yeah.

 

Ally Wyatt:

[crosstalk 00:05:04] was easy at times, for sure.

 

Alicia:

And I must say I know her mother very, very well, and I know Ally too since… Oh man, it’s been over about 15 years. So, I can imagine when you were saying that how Gil Stern was doing, “Now, honey, how was your day?”

 

Ally Wyatt:

Oh my goodness.

 

Alicia:

She loved to say that.

 

Ally Wyatt:

He did. When I went away to Pepperdine for college, Nick used to put the phone on speaker and set it in the middle of the dinner table and say, “You’re going to have to deal with this now. I can’t. I have nothing else to say.”

 

Eileen:

That’s a great foundation. They taught something very well there. That’s good.

 

Alicia:

It’s the foundation of communicating. And one of the questions I want to ask you because is a great skill and talent to have to communicate or really to tell stories. So, what is it about you now in a leadership role that allows you to be more proactive and reaching those to tell stories from a leadership perspective?

 

Ally Wyatt:

Something that I think resonates with me and I’m still learning in this space and trying to grow is that everyone has a story that you don’t know or a background that you don’t know. And I think that tells you so much about a person, obviously how they were raised and different things that they had gone through. And sometimes they’re willing to share these things and sometimes they aren’t.

 

Ally Wyatt:

But slowly just breaking down those barriers, at a comfortable level, but understanding and learning what makes that person tick kind of like my bio said, that for me is how I’ve learned it in a leadership role in the sense that I never try to push too hard, but at the same time, I… With interviews, for instance, especially with athletes, and there are different contexts, like at the end of the game, you know you don’t have a lot of time, so you’re getting your answers out, but I tried to understand them as a person before I would necessarily get into the X, Y, Z questions that I had to do. Because I think too, if you can learn how somebody communicates or how they’re comfortable communicating, the whole conversation is better. And you’re also putting them in a light that they feel comfortable.

 

Eileen:

Many of us see people externally and may assess something, but there’s so much more behind it. Each one of us didn’t do it. Everybody on this earth has a story. And we’re here to grow, be resilient and move forward, and make connections.

 

Alicia:

Yes.

 

Eileen:

So, when you are interviewing people and especially athletes and athletes are at a different level, they’re using not only their mind but their body every day performing and in coordination and understanding that. Is there a way that you see how you as an interviewee lead differently when you’re working with different categories of people you interview?

 

Ally Wyatt:

Yes. I’ve been fortunate in the sense that… In two of the teams that I worked with, I spent a lot of time with the players. And first and foremost, I think sometimes people don’t realize, and understandably so because you don’t see all behind the scenes as a fan, but to your point, these guys, they go through a lot. Their bodies are going through a lot and as you know, body and mind are very connected. I, as the reporter, traveled with and I wasn’t playing the game, I wasn’t having my body necessarily go through the hardships at times, but I was exhausted just from the schedule alone as I’m sure every reporter would say it was amazing and we love it and that’s why we do it, but it is a grueling schedule.

 

Ally Wyatt:

So, sometimes with these guys too, you have to realize you’re putting a camera in front of their face and asking them questions when they are exhausted on so many levels. So, I think to understand, to your point, just the context of going into something, that has a lot of… I don’t know if leadership is necessarily the right word that I would say, but I have a lot of understanding going into the situation. And again, understanding the personality that you’re talking to or, the context of the game that you’re talking to, or just where you are and the season and when you’re talking to these guys and like, are you on back to backs? Are you not? Like all of that plays into it because sometimes the best thing to do is to give the soft… Not the softball question necessarily, but to have the answer handout, but to get it short and sweet and move forward, because it’s just exhausting.

 

Ally Wyatt:

And you know what? You’re like, “If I do this for you now, three or four games down the road, then I can press you. Or then I can ask you the questions I really need to ask because right now it’s just… Understandably, this is not the right time.” And I think just not even necessarily with athletes, but I’ve learned that too with everyone I work with, both older, younger, when I’m giving advice too, sometimes when I’m in my moments. Like just understanding and taking a step back and trying to understand the context of when you’re having these discussions and when you’re answering these questions and even with my marriage. Sometimes my husband and I have this joke that if something’s going on, is it the shoe with the door situation? Or is it really about what we’re talking about right now in the sense that it’s a little confusing, but sometimes you’re frustrated about one thing, but it has to do with something that happened three days prior? And so, just understanding as a leader, as an individual who’s growing, “Okay, let’s dial it back. Let’s realize where we’re at and then answer.”

 

Alicia:

Yeah. And I liked that because leadership and communication kind of reality it’s connected and whether you are at work, or interviewing someone or your significant other, it is learning the style of what is leading them to act that way or what is the authentic issue because sometimes we put that under the cover and then something three or four days, and then you launch out at them at something, then you be like, “Whoa, whoa, whoa. I just asked you where the coffee was at.”

 

Ally Wyatt:

Exactly.

 

Alicia:

So, something else is going on and that’s all with detecting their ability to kind of respond from a role or a leadership role in the conversation and not attack the person. You know, what’s the conversation, or that the question is being asked? “Oh, you need the sugar for the coffee, or you want the coffee, or was it about you left the house and it was a mess.”

 

Ally Wyatt:

It’s so true. And, I mean, my husband was… It’s so funny, just with this pandemic we always joke. And just too for me taking a step back now with work and everything with the pregnancy, and he hasn’t had to travel as much, which has been a great blessing. I feel like our marriage is in such a different place of communication than where it was when we were earlier on, probably because we haven’t had as many breaks either, but in such a good way in the fact that we’re together all the time right now. And as I told you too, because we’re in the process of moving, we were literally in this room above my parents’ garage.

 

Ally Wyatt:

So, we were really together all the time. We’ll be in the middle of a conversation and my friends will even joke with us because all of a sudden I’ll be like, “You know what? That wasn’t very nice. Do you want to take that back?” And you’re like, “Yeah, I’m going take that back.” And I’m like, “Okay, great. Thank you.” You need to be able to dial it back, step back and feel that you’re comfortable enough to realize that, “Let’s even communicate a little bit more, let’s dig a little bit deeper.”

 

Alicia:

Yeah. One of the things on Soul of a Leader, we kind of ask our guests to talk about so many values. I always say, and we do a lot on our LinkedIn about values. Values are a guiding principle for anyone that’s in leadership. It doesn’t matter whether you’re leaving your home or your own business. And so, what are some of the… I would say your top four values, that you use to kind of really set the foundation for what you do in your business when you’re interviewing someone? What drives you to create those questions? What drive you to refrain from responding so negatively if something didn’t go right? What are some of the four top values that you use?

 

Ally Wyatt:

Even to values, lessons, if I can kind of correlate it with a lesson. Something that I’ve always tried, and again, we’re all growing, we’re all learning and I’m sure there have been times I haven’t been great at this but is leading by example. Anyone in the career field that I was in, it doesn’t matter if you were in front of the camera or behind the camera where you started from the bottom and you slowly work your way up, that’s just… Like, any job for the most part that’s how it works. And I have to say it was mind-blowing to me at times seeing some of these people that had reached some of the top platforms and could… I don’t want to say cruel necessarily, but be so short with some of the people that were behind the scenes or, “A lower level.”

 

Ally Wyatt:

And in my head, I kept thinking like, “But you were that person at that time like you came from there.” And so I tried to even if I was rushed or a lot of times before you’re going live on camera, you’re nervous, and so sometimes if someone’s asking you a question, the last thing you want to do is trying to answer that because you’re trying to concentrate on what you’re about to say, I tried to dial it back and just stay calm and lead by example and never be short or too fast in certain ways and it’s hard. It’s really hard. And I think it’s hard on the job. It’s hard in relationships. It’s hard at times to not just push forward and just answer abruptly. But in a leadership role, I think at least for me, some of the people that I look up to, are so calm and relaxed.

 

Ally Wyatt:

And we were talking about, for instance, Steadman. And he is somebody that, I think, is just remarkable. And every time I have a conversation with him, I leave just feeling like I had this beautiful meditation because he’s just so calm and the way he says and you really think about what he’s saying and it’s just always so beautiful, but it’s always so slow is the best way I can say it. There’s so much [crosstalk 00:16:32]

 

Alicia:

Soothing and calm, yes.

 

Ally Wyatt:

Yes. And so, I try to lead that way too. But I’m also somebody like I’m a [inaudible 00:16:42] So, there are times wherein hindsight, I’m like, “Wow, I acted on emotion too much. Or I should have waited to send that email,” or you know, all the things.

 

Alicia:

We all do it.

 

Ally Wyatt:

That’s another good lesson is to try and give some time before you act in emotion. But that is something that I would say value-wise as a leader, especially somebody who’s still rather young and growing in a lot of ways, that’s something that I try and do in every asset of my life. And then again, kind of what we touched on, just realizing, and I know this is hard, but everyone has a story. So, if somebody is being, “Tough on you,” try and not to take it personally. And I can say, I am somebody that struggles with that big time. And I was also in an industry where you’re under a microscope. So, I would have moments where it was hard. And I still do. You’re always learning, but I think the more you can just realize this is all part of it, and we’re on this earth for a given point of time and all of this has weight, but it also doesn’t in a certain way, there’s a bigger better story out there for all of us, it puts it in perspective.

 

Ally Wyatt:

And I think honestly, in a crazy way being pregnant and having this little, for me, a little girl inside me and it just completely puts me out of control, and realizing like that is something so much greater and bigger. That’s been extremely enlightening and calming in a lot of ways because it makes me realize what’s important.

 

Alicia:

Yeah.

 

Ally Wyatt:

I’m sorry, I know that was [crosstalk 00:18:35] not necessarily values but that’s things that have helped me as a leader.

 

Alicia:

Yes.

 

Ally Wyatt:

Well, a helpful leader.

 

Eileen:

Many values were in the description one, is resilience, patience, compassion, being nonjudgmental. And what I liked… What I say is a lot of time, our learnings are a lesson or a blessing, right?

 

Ally Wyatt:

Mm-hmm (affirmative).

 

Eileen:

And what connected with me, and I know it’s connected with Alicia, because we both went through our Ph.D., which… There’s a lot of people without the three letters because it’s a very hard process. But it makes you grow and it makes you stronger. The one thing that I know I have and Alicia and I have talked about is that when you see that bad behavior in someone and you see it, it’s like a check to yourself to say, “I am not going to act that way ever. And I’m going to pay it forward to the people behind me who I help up because where I came, how I’ve landed, where I’ve been and Alicia too, there were thousands of people who helped us.”

 

Eileen:

And it’s people we may not have even known. And then why give our energy to the people who, you know, were that way. I send compassion to them and I say, “Thank you for being a teacher. Thank you for making me learn.” So, what you shared in your story was a lot of great values of resilience, compassion, and judgment. That came out in different ways. And as you end, you are so excited to bring a child into the world and you probably have already liked this because I can feel it in your heart that it’s not just about me, it’s about everybody, we’re all connected. And we’re sharing this planet. And we share energy and there is karma. So, that’s what I got out of what you’ve said.

 

Ally Wyatt:

I think that’s so beautiful and something I would add to that without getting into too much specific detail of situations I went through but also learning that there are going to be some people out there that aren’t going to be in your corner, and are going to be hurtful and be in the wrong and sometimes through hierarchy or whatever it is that you just have to realize that is the way it is. And it’s unfortunate and it’s unfair, but also as much as you want to try and change the situation, it might not necessarily be the battle. And I have messed up on this at times because sometimes I battle things that are in hindsight and I’m like, “You know what? I was not wrong to battle it, but I probably should have just put that energy elsewhere.” And realizing like you’ve said, karma, and that it all has a way of working itself out or it doesn’t but then you learn a lesson for yourself that will help you down the line.

 

Ally Wyatt:

So, I think that’s another thing that I’ve learned in a leadership way and to your point, and I hope I can teach this little girl it’s… We’ve been raised, especially as females to always stand up for what’s right and we should, but at some point too, there’s a level of being strategic through all of this and realizing that, as women in a competitive field like, yeah, you’re going to have hardships and you don’t have to necessarily fight every single battle. You’ve got to know which battles to fight and which ones to say, “Okay, that’s wrong. I’m stepping away. I’m no longer going to put energy towards that person or situation and move forward.” But that to me is as much of a win and I see that now, going through some of the stuff I’ve gone through than when I necessarily was starting. And I think sometimes if you can be quiet and inward in that way, that’s almost being stronger than being the loud voice in the room that’s trying to showcase that, “Yes, I’m strong and yes, I understand right and wrong,” and all of those things.

 

Eileen:

It takes strength not to put energy where the negativity is because negative, sometimes, behaviors, people will do it so that you’ll react and they thrive off the drama. And I have come up with an acronym for drama, which is drastic reactions about minor attributes.

 

Ally Wyatt:

I love that. [inaudible 00:23:31]

 

Alicia:

I love it.

 

Eileen:

Yeah, drastic reactions about minor attributes because people will say things you’ll never agree with. I mean, people have their opinions but where do you want to put your energy? Where do you want to feel like you want to be around people who will support you, will serve you, right?

 

Alicia:

Yes.

 

Eileen:

Serve your energy, and grow you, challenge you? And if there’s negativity, that will just bring your frequency down and it’ll just mess you up even more. So, that was a great story and analogy that you’ve just shared. So, thank you, Ally.

 

Ally Wyatt:

Of course, I hope that’s helpful.

 

Alicia:

And one of the things I got out of listening to you Ally is, when it comes to women, we have been sort of taught to, “Don’t act emotional, don’t respond, don’t say anything.” And I think what has happened… I think we were told to do that without explaining that you need to know when to say something, you need to know when not to say something, instead of just, “Don’t say anything, let it go.” And sometimes we internalize all of that. So, I’ve been teaching myself over the last… I don’t know, five, six, seven, eight years of, “It’s okay to say something. I just need to know when. So, I need to know not to push the send button on the email right away. Let me wait three days.” My thing is three days. If it’s bothering me, I need to say something.

 

Alicia:

And typically when I release it, then I’m fine. But we were taught, if we react or say something, then that’s the only thing that’ll be remembered by us as women. And then sometimes, well, they’re weak, or they’re crying or they’re emotional, but we are normal, but it’s also okay to express some concern about whatever the situation is. And so, one of the things about what I want to say is, so how do you challenge others to be their best or maybe other women to be their best and making better decisions on when to react or speak out? Because we can’t allow other women just to be silent because sometimes women do that and then you’re being walked on when you should be saying something. And so, where’s the balancing act that we need to encourage other women because we’re not all emotional. We do have a valid point sometimes, and we are strong, but because we react it doesn’t mean we’re weak. So, how do you challenge other women to be their best?

 

Ally Wyatt:

I think that’s such an amazing point and so true. I think there’s a level of it too, is that as a female, and I’m realizing this now, more than ever, I was so career-driven and I still am and I hope and want to get back into that and try to figure out what all of that looks like now with a little girl. But there are also… There’s a lot of facets of life as a female that we’re trying to juggle and trying to balance. And I don’t care if you are on TV if you are… One of my best friends is a lawyer. You know, all these different things that you can do in life, and that can be career-oriented, but understanding, one, how to balance it all, two, how to emotionally, not only articulate that, but understand that within yourself.

 

Ally Wyatt:

Because I also think as women who are especially extremely career-oriented sometimes you feel guilty for trying to balance it all. At least I did at times but at the same time, I realized how much of my identity was in my career going through this process and having to say no to jobs and having to dial it back because we did that, for me and health reasons. I think to your point, it’s taking that step back and trying to internally understand, “Okay, is it society that’s telling me to feel this way, or is it how I feel?” And something I started doing is that my husband is just very different and that’s, I think, why we work so well is he is so good about just taking a beat and trying to sift through everything before he articulates something while I’m a little bit different.

 

Ally Wyatt:

But he said, “Ally, why don’t you look at five years down the line where you want to be for your mind, for your body, for our family, for your career, for all of these things, and you don’t have to say, I want to be at this level necessarily in this company. But truly understand without people telling you what you should want or where you should be.” For me, for a while there, my career was just totally taking off, and then, I had to dial that back. So, understanding like there are seasons for all of this too, it’s okay to want different things at different times, it’s okay to take steps back and it’s also, I think, especially as women, and I shouldn’t just say women, I’m sure men too, but understanding like identity it’s a big work.

 

Ally Wyatt:

So, for me, I can’t tell you how many nights I didn’t sleep when I left certain jobs or I turned down certain jobs. And I was like, “Oh my God, I just made the biggest mistake of my life.” And maybe some of those I should have taken some of those opportunities, it’s hard, but at the same time there’s a reason for everything and there is a reason as you move forward and you grow in different aspects of your life. And I think now I’m so much more confident in who I am as an individual, in every aspect of my life that the career side to me is still extremely important, but it doesn’t hold the make or break weight that it used to and that is empowering. And that is allowing me to be a better leader in a lot of ways.

 

Eileen:

So, Ally, what you just said is so enlightening because I always say, “Listen and silent have the same letters.” And when we are moving so fast in our career [inaudible 00:30:11] Alicia and I did this earlier in our careers. Go, go, go. We have to do this. We have to go to school at night. We have to teach, we have to do them all the have, have, have to, have to. But when you become at peace and you listen to what’s in your heart, and you have that time, which you have now to listen, what your husband said about planning becomes clearer because there’s not all this data coming. So, sometimes you have to turn those things down or say no, so you can say yes to yourself and yes to your future. And it may be hard as women and it may be hard as men but I think what we’re learning also from this pandemic is that dialing back isn’t that bad, right?

 

Alicia:

Yeah.

 

Eileen:

Your time with family, your time with yourself, time to reconnect, and what was all the busyness about? What was the business about? And that’s where I’m at. I’m like, “Wow. How did I do all of that? Or why did I do all of that? And now I’m really happy and just enjoying life. I talked to a lot of my friends and they were like, “Well, when we’re done here, I’m not going to go on a hundred miles an hour anymore. I’m going to stay at 50 miles an hour.” So, thank you for sharing that because I think what you said was more impactful to the present-day and self-discovery and self-awareness than many of us may not know.

 

Ally Wyatt:

Of course, it’s a lesson and it’s something that I still struggle with. I’m somebody that thinks about the past and the future a lot. And I’m trying to be more at the moment and I’m getting a lot better at it. But I think… I can’t remember the quote, honestly, at the top of my head that my cousin sent me something like, “True happiness is living in the moment.” And my dad we do these walks every night now that I’m at my parents just for me to able to get some exercise. And he was like… And this is going to sound a little silly, but there is something so beautiful about this. I have two… I call them puppies. They’re 80-pound dogs so they’re big dogs, but he goes, “They’re the epitome of happiness.”

 

Ally Wyatt:

And it kind of goes with my cousin’s quote is that they’ve got a stick and they’re so excited about the stick and then they see water and they’re so excited about water and just watching them on these walks it’s so enlightening. And to me as silly as this sounds, but that is happy. That’s what I’m striving for and that’s what I hope to be with my little girl and with my husband. And you could hand me everything in the world and if you could hand me that I would take that at this point because I’ve seen enough to know that.

 

Alicia:

I was listening to both of you guys and I was thinking about something really interesting that you said Ally, identity is a big issue and it is in society. And a lot of times people go after things that are, as Eileen was saying, that we thought was so important and you said it, that we just thought was just so… This is everything. And then you look back and say, “Is it that thing? Or is it me about building the identity on something that eventually I won’t be able to raise my child the way I want to? If I’m so sucked into building this identity with a job that I thought probably was going to be the best job.” Or with all the social media, we kind of… Society or individuals, look at things that they see on the outwardness all about identity, and sometimes it can be real and sometimes it can be false. So, one of the things, before we get ready to end, is what keeps you grounded in understanding your love for relationships, your love for becoming a mom? What is that one thing that’s keeping you grounded?

 

Ally Wyatt:

It’s a really good question. A very tough question. It’s a very good question. I think, for better, for worse, since I was a little girl, I’ve always believed… Again, this sounds a little cheesy, but, “Strive to be what you want to be,” and it is not easy and I can tell you [crosstalk 00:34:50] I have struggled at times. But I still do believe that. And I think now more so than ever, I believe that in a balance. So, I believe that through my marriage, I believe that through hopefully being a great mom, I believe that through a career and maybe multiple careers and what all of that looks like.

 

Ally Wyatt:

And so for me, I think just having that hope in trying to stay positive as much [crosstalk 00:35:25] and be in the little moments and also know though that like it is so okay and it is so not a reality if you think that this does not happen to cry and to have really tough times. And to know that like… I mean, I can’t even tell you, I had breakdowns at times and panic attacks and things that people just do not know, or have never seen because my social media doesn’t portray that. And that is real in me and it was very raw and that is okay. That is part of growing and learning and what makes us human.

 

Ally Wyatt:

And if you think that other people don’t go through that, you are so mistaken. And honestly, I think the more that I can get comfortable in myself and portraying that and sharing that, and weirdly, having confidence in that and knowing that that is sexy, and that is awesome that I had those raw moments and those tough moments and that I made a fool of myself at that point, or I was awesome at that one thing and everyone thought it was great. Like all of that combined, that’s good and that’s moving forward and that’s growing.

 

Ally Wyatt:

And growing isn’t necessarily hitting the checkbox after the checkbox. And we know what society tells you at times it’s all of it. So, I think for me and young women and young men and older women, everyone just to know, like it is okay to have the ups and the downs and if you don’t, then you kind of need to take a step back and realize like, “Okay, what is it that I’m striving for? And how is my life [inaudible 00:37:10] fulfilled as I want to try and have it be.” So, that’s, I guess, the best advice I could give.

 

Eileen:

And growing, you know? We’re growing until the day we leave this beautiful planet. Every day, you will continue to grow and what you shared reminds me, I built a labyrinth and I walk a labyrinth. There’s a labyrinth off of [inaudible 00:37:35] Avenue by St. James. I think it’s on Heran or Superior Street. And life and challenges are like a labyrinth. There’s no straight line to growth. And there will be weaves and in and out and you will move forward and grow. And what you just shared was just very beautiful because we’re all vulnerable.

 

Eileen:

We have a range of emotions as humans and people who don’t use that range, usually, are not living in the present because they’re not moving through it. Moving through what is coming to you will help you grow. So, thank you for sharing that Ally. And it’s been a wonderful conversation and we never have enough time. There’s so much wisdom and honesty and truth and compassion and vulnerability that was shared in this conversation. And as we always close out with our host of the podcast is, we ask you if you could share with us some words of wisdom that you would like to leave with our listeners.

 

Ally Wyatt:

For me, I think at different times in life, I would say there have been different pieces of wisdom that have meant a lot to me. I’d say now, having so much time to myself, with the pandemic, with everything that we’re all going through, trying to love yourself, that is wisdom. And again, I know that’s something people say all the time, but put weight on that and understand what that is and love all the different parts, the good and the bad and realize that you have your strengths and your weaknesses and how you for you, not for anyone else, not for society, but can grow from that and figure out the imprint you want to make based on that and how to continue moving forward for yourself. I’d say that is, I don’t think sometimes people put enough wisdom… Or wait, excuse me, on that.

 

Ally Wyatt:

They think about an outer context or how to make this significant change. And I think all of that is beautiful and good, but I think if you can dial it back and internalize for you and yourself and in a way be selfish for you, there’s a lot of beauty in that, and there’s a lot of growth in that and a lot of healing. That’s in a nutshell, what I would say, what’s helping me right now and the season of life I’m going through right now and trying to grow from.

 

Alicia:

I love it. Love yourself.

 

Eileen:

Yes. Thank you so much. Well, if you don’t love yourself or put the oxygen mask on yourself, how can you help others?

 

Ally Wyatt:

Exactly.

 

Alicia:

Yeah.

 

Eileen:

It’s a wonderful, wonderful, sharing. So, thank you so much, Ally. Thank you so much for spending time with us, sharing your story, sharing your experience, sharing your life. So, thank you.

 

Alicia: 

Thank you for joining us on the Soul of a Leader podcast. We are knighting a new way of leading with your soul and interviewing ordinary people with extraordinary impact. Thank you for listening to the stories of our leaders who will help and guide you on your leadership journey. For more information on our podcast, please visit our website at www.soulofaleader.com. Thank you for listening.

 

With Dr. Eileen & Dr. Alicia

Conversations with ordinary people, with extraordinary impact on strategies, success stories, spirituality and leadership.

With Dr. Eileen & Dr. Alicia

Conversations with ordinary people, with extraordinary impact on strategies, success stories, spirituality and leadership.